Goatmoose

Adam Lambert has been the most discussed character on this year’s season of American Idol. Some love him, many hate him, but nobody can deny his fiercely perfect ability to hit notes that would make Dennis DeYoung, Freddie Mercury and Mika warm their britches with tangy pee streams of musical envy.

He’s a crazy fellow, and you never know what you’re going to get from his performances. He can butcher Johnny Cash songs and still make them enjoyable, or be totally rockawesome singing the classic Tears For Fears hit “Mad World.” He described himself on Idol as someone who always wanted to play dress up instead of soccer. Obviously. But enough about all that! This fellow used to be a Biblical slave.

That’s right – if he reaches the American Idol finals, it won’t be his first time on stage at the Kodak Theatre. In 2004, he was in a vastly expensive musical production of “The Ten Commandments,” produced by clothing guy Max Azria and starring Val Kilmer as Moses. If that brief description sounds like a slowly spinning lazy susan of crap, you’d apparently be right. The show got junk reviews. The huge cast was no good, the choreography and songs were awful… I just wish I could have seen it!

There was one bright spot, however. Guess who.

Lambert was the slave Joshua. In the video below, you can watch his solo number. It’s a horrible song, but he sings it like crazy. I can’t imagine he’d be this good at soccer, so I guess he picked the right route wanting to play dress up and sing songs.